Sunday, August 4, 2013

Internet Dating-Why Don't They Offer Background Checks?

Internet Dating (1)
This is an attempt to write an honest commentary concerning internet dating.

First, understand, why I use the internet to meet people. I am fifty-eight, awkwardly shy, hate the bar scene, don’t really belong to a specific church group and work a lot. I know these are all excuses but there it is.

Secondly, the positives are great. You can develop a marketing plan; outline what you’re looking for, find a site that meets your needs and then just "post it". It is as simple as that and it can be done from a telephone. Prospects come to your computer, telephone or where ever you have an app for the dating site. You can pretend to be selective and it is exciting to be pursued by so many potential suitors.

Last, but most importantly, the negatives can be devastating. Don’t get me wrong, internet dating has the potential to be a great experience if the site would actually screen their members for being in a marriage, scammers from Nigeria or having criminal and psychiatric backgrounds. I would actually pay money for a service that includes this benefit. I mean who wants to even have a phone conversation with a lonesome felon, convicted of murder, schizophrenics on his or her meds or the married liars just looking for a one night stand. If it sounds and looks too good to be true, proceed with caution.

People will argue that the site makes the difference. That the free sites because by their accessability will attract nothing but the wrong people vs. sites you have to pay a monthly charge. I am here to tell you, unless the site performs background checks, which none do, the only difference is you are paying money for your membership searches. By the way, it is a fact that more than 65% of the people that indulge in false profiles are transients and they will roam from one site to another looking for “NEW” people or victims.

My Tips:
If someone lists that they are "legally separated", it has been my experience that they are more than likely married or involved. Think about it, if they truly are legally separated, would they be in a rebound situation? Is this really where your search prospects are headed and would this be a good fit, long-term?

If their interested in a casual encounter it is a booty call and the chances that they are also married is greater than 50%. I know this from personal experience. Now, if this is your modus operande, well, there you go.

Look out for the felons, perverts, mental cases and alternative life style folks. I am slowly developing the opinion that you have better odds finding a good guy for a potential long term relationship by walking into a corner bar and just picking up the first dude that offers to buy you a drink. 

If you still like the internet dating scene, then my advice to you is that you proceed with caution. Remember these people are strangers and there is a protocol that needs to be maintained just for your safety. Take your time getting to know someone. Once you introduce yourself, first names and a telephone numbers are exchanged, a full name should be provided. If this is a problem? Then, there is a problem! Think about it. Google search every potential date and a reverse phone number look-up on their telephone number? Make sure you talk on the telephone for at least a week; this is the interview period get as much information on their background and relationships. Look for inconsistencies. Make it clear that dishonesty is a deal breaker and meet in a public place.

My Personal Rant:

Like if you’re married and just out for a good time and just forget to mention this small detail to your wife and potential new girlfriend; Your background omits small stuff like a couple of felonies back home or being 65 with two children one 40 and the other “a five year old” and the fact your looking forward to paying child support until you die; your profile pictures represents a person that was 20 years younger and 50 to 100 pounds lighter; or the fact you had a felony charge, many years ago, but it was for a small matter like murder.

Oh no worries, this will all be reconciled on the first "Meet and Greet" as well as the colostomy bag or the inability to perform even with the little "blue' pill. I mean, what can you do with this type of profile falsification? What are you really thinking? Is the fantasy of allure and false marketing made you daft? Do you really believe that the lies will somehow be overlooked once the truth comes out face to face!!!

The bottom line is that background checks need to be added into the business model to enhance a positive safe experience. Members will pay for this added benefit!

Peace Diana

(c) Copywrite by Diana Mary Sharpton


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