Wednesday, June 26, 2013

If I had to name a baby, I would do it just like Kim Kardashian!

I never get to listen to the news anymore because of my summer schedule; that said what did I miss in a week? A lot! 

Sleeping Baby Girl (1)
My conversation today is about the process of naming your baby. Back in the day, I went traditional, in the sense; my children got names that were listed as typical “people” names somewhere on this planet. I was unconventional to my family, because I didn't use the naming convention of various family members. So, I went with Irish and Italian names. Why? I love Italian/Irish names and I wanted my kids to have rare and uncommon names in comparison to other American babies. I never considered how my children would actually feel about this heavy burden of carrying my need for all things individualistic. My daughter even changed the spelling of her name (not legally) for many years. I was confused, by this action. She didn't appreciate the complex spelling or how completely baffling its traditional enunciation might be to others. Wow!

Well, in the news, which I am so far behind reading, I noticed that my protagonist, Kim Kardashian (KK from the rest of this discussion), named her new born daughter "North West." Now, in defense of KK, if I was in this position again and had the opportunity to burden a brand new person’s life with a nostalgic and or bizarre name, I would do it all over again! This time I would probably be like KK and name my children based on the “Event” and or “Location” of making the baby.

EVENT – I would no longer focus on any kind of spiritual significance or unusual foreign influence, no, just how we got here! For example:

Holla Sharpton - if getting there was memorable to say the least, you know what I mean.
Really WhWi (short for Where the Hell Was I?) Sharpton - the event was an unfortunate circumstance in conception hell.

LOCATION – I would want to continue being CONSISTENT to "EVENT" (this is to fulfill my role as an accountant) something I am reminded about everyday. For Example:

AnA (short for Anytime and Anywhere) Sharpton – this would be a second baby to Holla’s baby daddy, if you know what mean! Oh yeah!

Not Again Sharpton – I would probably claim a mental disorder at this point to cover up the fact I went back, had sex and got catch with another baby from WhWi’s baby daddy. Oh man, it happens, not a lot but to a few!

Okay, so I am having a little fun but check it out. What is little North West going to do in High School? It may help that her parents are rich but she is going to get a beat down all her life!

Just keeping it real, folks! Peace Diana…

(c) Copywrite by Diana Mary Sharpton
1. Photograph: Sleeping Baby Girl. Original web location was not located